GIGGLE THROTTLE

Things just keep gettin' mo' awesome.

2010-09-28T14:10:00.000-07:00

Today I auditioned for Cirque Du Soleil.

Like for real. I did so on the recommendation of a friend who teaches for Cirque in Tokyo (Thanks Paul!) and I figured, why the heck not?!

I completed the online application, sent in a demo reel and waited. Two weeks later I received an invitation to audition.

The audition began at 9am today at the Alvin Ailey School downtown. The audition consisted of several group exercises, and movement pieces that were too much fun. After the group stuff, each performer (there were 25-30) had to perform a 2 minute silent piece. The senior artistic talent scout selected a few auditionees to coach/direct after their 2 min pieces, and I was one of them.

At noon all but 9 were let go. There were 8 guys left, and ME!!!

After our lunch break we resumed with group exercises. After the group work we were put into pairs for scene work and clowning, and then performed those pieces. After the duo portion of the audition he called individuals and pairs up to perform parts of various Cirque shows.

I was asked to play the famed lady bug in Ovo.

I seriously had a blast. I mean, at that point the only one I was competing against was myself so it was a win/win situation. After everyone performed we were sent into the hallway so the panel could deliberate. The casting agent came into the hallway and said three names.

And one of them was MINE!!!

After the rest of the group was dismissed we were asked back into the audition room and did some on camera Q&A, then we were dismissed at 4PM. Before I left the senior artistic talent scout grabbed me and said that he loved me, gave me his information and said that he sees me in Cirque. He gushed and I blushed. I mean when you have a man like THAT say such nice things (and in a French accent) I couldn't help but feel like I was floating.

So what happens next? I'm so glad you asked. Well he will take the footage they shot of the whole day back to Montreal to show to the top people. We could potentially be cast at any time, in any show. In the meantime I wait. I wait and laugh at the embarrassment of riches that is my life.

Things just keep gettin' mo awesome.

Ahoy there matey!

2010-09-12T08:31:00.000-07:00

So, I'm a Pirate. Earlier this month I auditioned for The Story Pirates. An amazing group of actors, teachers and puppeteers that take children's stories perform them with puppets and original songs in a weekly mainstage show. They also do over 100 writing and performance residencies in schools throughout the year.

And look ma! I made it!

I will be in training and will appear in my first show in November. I can't wait. I hope you can make it. Yar, ye be needin to se see what this Story Pirate does!

Friday, November 19, 2010

Story Pirates Show

Time: TBD

Street: 250 West 40th Street

Location: Drama Bookshop

City/Town: NY, NY 10018

Cost: TBD

LOOK MA! I MADE IT!

2010-09-09T11:53:00.001-07:00

BIG NEWS!
BIG NEWS
BIG NEWS!

So, I applied for the NBC Universal Diversity Scholarship offered by the People's Improv Theatre. Recipients receive a FREE improv education from the PIT. Awesomeness squared. And yesterday I got the call that I was selected to be a....

TOP 1O FINALIST

What does this mean? Well, I'll tell you. THIS IS HUGE!!! As a finalist I will be performing in The Improv Diversity Scholarship Finalist Showcase. In addition to the NBC Universal and PIT administrators, there will be casting directors, network execs, agents and managers will be in attendance. So even if I don't receive the scholarship, I have already received an opportunity to be seen by industry professionals doing what I love!

I NEED YOUR SUPPORT!!!

Please, please, please, please come out and support me.
I need to have the audience filled with faces that I trust and that will give me the confidence and support I need to have my best show. Here are the details.

NBC/PIT
SCHOLARSHIP
FINALIST SHOWCASE

Monday, September 27
7PM at The Peoples Improv Theater
154 W. 29th Street, 2nd floor
Cost: FREE

PLEASE ARRIVE BY 6:15PM TO GET A SEAT!

"As part of its successful Talent Diversity Initiative, NBC Universal announced a second year of NBCU's Improv Scholarship Program in partnership with The Peoples Improv Theater (The PIT) in New York City in an effort to support and promote diversity within the arts. This is the third year in a row The PIT and NBC have partnered to sponsor three deserving individuals in their comedy education, and this year they're letting you check out the finalists in their Finalist Showcase! Don't miss this one-time only show!"

All my love,
Natasha

I feel like this today.

2010-08-26T11:39:00.000-07:00

If I had a million dollars...

2010-08-24T06:09:00.001-07:00

If money were no option, what would you do for a living?

Happy Monday Folks

2010-08-23T09:56:00.001-07:00

D'OH!

2010-08-22T08:57:00.000-07:00

Rather than make new mistakes, I think it's best to repeat and perfect the same mistakes. But as the song goes, "Pick your self up, dust your self off and start all over again..." Happy Sunday people.

Fierce. Fab. Funny.

2010-08-20T15:26:00.000-07:00

Who knew my mother was Jewish?

2010-08-16T11:29:00.000-07:00

Mom: I love your new profile picture.

Me: That's Matt and I in Japan.

Mom: Why don't you marry him?

Me: Mom. For the last time, we are just friends.

Mom: Why can't you just bring home a nice Jewish boy?

New Shows Added!

2010-08-13T09:47:00.000-07:00

Shows Update.
Here's a list of upcoming shows that Natasha is doing.

Small Teams Festival at The Creek
feat. Hodapp and Rothwell
Friday, August 20, 2010

Time: 8:00pm - 9:00pm
Street: 10-93 Jackson Ave
Location: The Creek and The Cave
City/Town: Long Island City, NY
Cost: FREE

NEW!!! Ninja Sex Party at The PIT
feat. Hodapp and Rothwell
Friday, August 28, 2010

Time: 11:00pm - 12:00am
Street: 154 W. 29th ST, 2nd FL
Location: The PIT
City/Town: NY, NY
Cost: $5.00

NEW!!! Couples Retreat at The Creek
feat. Hodapp and Rothwell
Friday, August 30, 2010

Time: 9:30pm - 11:00pm
Street: 10-93 Jackson Ave
Location: The Creek and The Cave
City/Town: Long Island City, NY
Cost: FREE

Duo Festival hosted by PHIT
feat. Hodapp and Rothwell

Philly Improv Theater (PHIT) will host DUOFEST 2010, the first-ever improv comedy festival dedicated to comedic duos, in Philadelphia on September 30-October 3, 2010.

I miss Asia.

2010-08-12T10:26:00.000-07:00

The Home Office Neglected to Tell Me

2010-08-12T09:29:00.000-07:00

Apparently Tyler Perry is doing a movie of Ntozake Shange's prolific play For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf.

I have mixed feelings.

The play is practically a rite of passage for any actress of color. I've been in two productions of it (playing Lady in Yellow in one and Lady in Orange in the other). Ntozake's words are timeless. They possess the power to affect those see it, and change the lives of those who perform it.

It's risky to put work like this on the big screen because of the temptations to make the work more palatable for broader audiences - smoothing the edges and diluting the message - when the jaggedness of the pill, and potency or her message are what makes her work prolific, specific and an agent of change in women of color.

I hope (pray) the film does her work justice.

We all look alike.

2010-08-11T09:06:00.000-07:00

*Doppleganger is an all black, all female improv troupe in NYC that I'm NOT in, nor have I ever performed with. (Although, I think it would be a blast!)

Cock Blocked

2010-08-10T12:49:00.001-07:00

Upcomming Shows!

2010-08-07T12:59:00.000-07:00

Shows.
Here's a list of upcoming shows that Natasha is doing.

Kaleidoscope
feat. Team Jarreau with Natasha Rothwell
Monday, August 9, 2010

The Kaleidoscope is an improv experiment where four improvisers every week form teams of 6-8 people from different experience levels and theatres to perform together for the first (and last) time.

Time: 7:30pm - 9:00pm
Street: 10-93 Jackson Ave
Location: The Creek and The Cave
City/Town: Long Island City, NY
Cost: FREE

Small Team Festival at The Creek
feat. Hodapp and Rothwell
Friday, August 20, 2010

Time: 8:00pm - 9:00pm
Street: 10-93 Jackson Ave
Location: The Creek and The Cave
City/Town: Long Island City, NY
Cost: FREE

Duo Festival hosted by PHIT
feat. Hodapp and Rothwell

Philly Improv Theater (PHIT) will host DUOFEST 2010, the first-ever improv comedy festival dedicated to comedic duos, in Philadelphia on September 30-October 3, 2010.

http://duofest.com/

Awkwardness.

2010-07-25T15:12:00.000-07:00

Yes, I will marry you!

2010-07-18T15:31:00.001-07:00

Sometimes no response is the response.

2010-07-18T15:22:00.000-07:00

Decisions.

2010-07-18T09:12:00.000-07:00

Each day we're faced with decisions. They range from the mundane to the profound. From deciding what we want to eat to deciding who we want to become. How we decide the latter is a result of what's important to us. Those core values that we keep safe from erosion. Those things we hold dear, that matter, that at the end of the day remain in tact.

Fighting for a dream is not child's play. To settle is death. So I choose to run screaming into the dark abyss in spite of the attractiveness of security and the lull of stability. I do this, I choose this because my dreams and my passions come from the core of who I am, that protected center of my being. And to let that go, to give up the fight is to loose who I am.

So in the face fear and doubt I stand.

Knees knocking.

Teeth chattering.

Heart pounding.

I stand.

She's No Samantha Bee.

2010-07-07T11:42:00.001-07:00

Hot Hot Hot.

2010-07-06T09:42:00.000-07:00

Nailed it.

2010-05-12T16:41:00.000-07:00

Here's an example of my negativity which, until recently, I wasn't even aware of:

Cute Man On Train - (tapping my arm from his seat) Would you like to sit down?

Me - Oh, no thanks.

My Brain - That cute guy offered ME a seat.....He probably thinks I'm cute.....He probably thinks I'm pregnant...He probably thinks I'm retarded.....That cute guy offered a retard a seat on the train.

Beep Bop Beep Bop Blerg

2010-05-11T19:28:00.000-07:00

Show Tonight!

2010-05-07T19:00:00.000-07:00

[(Hodapp and Rothwell) - Hodappy] + Phillips = Phillips and Rothwell

SPECIAL MASH-UP EDITION OF

HODAPP AND ROTHWELL

ONE NIGHT ONLY!!!

Start Time:	Friday, April 23, 2010 at 11:30pm
End Time:	Saturday, April 24, 2010 at 12:30am
Location:	The Magnet Theater
Street:	254 W. 29th Street
City/Town:	New York, NY

A Man Who Shall Remain Nameless.

2010-05-05T04:44:00.000-07:00

So there's this guy. Let's call him, Lemont. And he’s dick.

He has been put into my life to test my patience, forgiveness and faith in God. What has Lemont done? On the surface it doesn’t seem like much, just a general lack of kindness, support and understanding. Here is an allegory that best expresses our relationship.

Imagine you are a duck named Natasha and there’s this other duck named Lemont. And Natasha is sleeping under a tree and Lemont comes along and shits in Natasha’s eye.

Natasha forgives Lemont.

Next, imagine then that Natasha the duck is taking an afternoon swim, when she gets a cramp. She is trying to tread water but is bobbing beneath the surface. Natasha opens her mouth to cry out for help and Lemont shits in her mouth.

Natasha forgives Lemont.

Finally Natasha the duck sees her friend Nora the robin has a broken wing. Natasha does everything she can to save her friend but it looks like Nora is badly hurt. Natasha the duck can see the life is slipping away from her dear friend Nora the robin. Natasha tries hold back her tears. And just as Nora tries to utter the words, “I love you,” Lemont shits in Nora’s mouth.

You get the point.

My new goal is to figure out how to turn lemons into lemonade (preferably lemonade with some Malibu), and find the good in my relationship with Lemont. Because if it doesn’t change, I’ll pluck, skin, batter and deep fry his ass…with love and understanding.

2010-04-30T07:52:00.000-07:00

Shows.

Here's a list of upcoming shows that Natasha is doing.

Reverse 5 feat. The Landlords

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Time: 6:45pm - 8:00pm

Street: 154 W. 29th ST

Location: The PIT

City/Town: New York, NY

Cost: $8.00

Tickets: http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/69447

Spring: Up the Creek Festival

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Street: 10-93 Jackson Ave

Location: The Creek and The Cave

City/Town: Long Island City, NY

Cost: FREE

12PM - 2PM DC Knickerbockers: The Reunion

6PM - 8PM Hodapp and Rothwell

8PM - 10PM The Landlords

Tapas! Tapas! Tapas!

hosted by The Landlords

Monday, May 3, 2010

Time: 9:00PM

Street: 10-93 Jackson Ave

Location: The Creek and The Cave

City/Town: Long Island City, NY

Cost: FREE

Hodapp and Rothwell

Friday, May 7, 2010

Friday, May 14, 2010

Friday, May 21, 2010

Time: 11:30PM

Street: 256 W. 29th (Between 7th and 8th)

Location: The Magnet Theater

City/Town: New York, NY

Cost: $5.00

Tickets: 212-244-8824

Projects.

Here's what Natasha's been working on lately.

So, I'm a playwright. I said those words aloud for the first time recently. The thing is, in New York you're forced to label yourself before someone else does. When you meet other artistic types they want to know who you are, what you do and if you're of any value to who they are or what they do. I've written two screenplays, several one acts, countless monologues and most recently a play that I'm very proud of. So, I guess that makes me a playwright.

My newest work is an anti-love story called Raisins and Religion. I've had two readings of it, one in Tokyo and one in NYC. The goal is to get this puppy off the ground and into the NYC Fringe next year, and maybe Edinburgh. Why the heck not?

Stay tuned for more info about a stage reading of the work this fall.

I'm back.

2010-04-27T18:14:00.000-07:00

Back. In. Business.

2009-09-06T16:50:00.005-07:00

New York, where you been my whole life?

2009-06-25T08:34:00.001-07:00

Life with an iPhone may rival Obama's presidency.

I make mistakes - News at 11.

2009-06-04T22:38:00.000-07:00

Mama Mia...

2009-05-28T20:46:00.000-07:00

[Watching "So You Think You Can Dance"]

Me: I wanna rewind so I can listen to that song.

Mom: Well, hurry up because I want to watch sex.

Me: Can you not ever say those words in that order again. So long as I am alive. Ever. Please.

Mom: What? I want to see that sex dance.

*Note: Sex is also a SYTYCD auditionee.

Yes.

2009-05-22T08:55:00.001-07:00

I love my S'mother.

2009-05-21T19:59:00.000-07:00

Mom: (gestures to lower back) I want to get a tattoo here.

Natasha: You know what that's called, right?

Mom: No.

Natasha: A tramp stamp.

Mom: Oh.

(Beat)
Natasha: Because that's where a tramp... would get a... a stamp.

Mom: Oh, man. I really wanted one there.

Natasha: Seriously?

Mom: Yeah.

Natasha: What would it to say?

Mom: "Tramp Stamp." That way there'd be no confusion.

I'm back bitches.

2009-04-16T12:50:00.000-07:00

Soawesome

2009-01-10T05:28:00.000-08:00

2008 was a really fem-French year for me.
Yelle, Yael Naim and Soko.
We. We. and double We.

Ah Soko. I discovered Soko during one of my epic MySpace Music binges in which I find myself clicking on an artists' top friend's top artists' friend's artist's....... I basically did that until I found myself in France and on Soko's page. I was blown away by her style, her lyrics and her simplicity. All the same, I was saddened to discover that she didn't have a record out yet.

Well, God bless Japan, because I've managed to download her tour EP, Sokute, and it's dope. Mad dope, yo. With songs like, "My Wet Dreams," "Dandy Cowboys," and, "I'll Kill Her," you really can't help but fall in love with the squeaky, angsty, Ukulele playing Soko.

Enjoy!

My Wet Dreams

I'll Kill Her

Dandy Cowboys

The Gender of Comedy

2009-01-04T08:46:00.000-08:00

I struggle with the whole gender comedy issue.

It's a very slippery slope. Too fem, or too him: either way you sacrifice something. That's the way it's always been. That's why I've made the conscious decision not to refer to myself as a "female comic," or "female improvisor," but as a comic or improvisor. I just happen to be a woman. Because for me if you're going to be in the boys club (and it is a boys club), labeling yourself as a "female comic" or "female improvisor" A) suggests that your particular brand of comedy is for female audiences, B) suggests that you do not see yourself as an equal with the men who you share the stage with, and C) that your humor is dependent on your gender.

My aversion to dressing my comedy in pink doesn't change the fact that I'm a lady, or that the struggle goes much deeper than labels. There is a fierce tradition of funny ladies who have paved the way, who have struggled, and who have fought to make it possible that women can make a living doing comedy. I have an enormous amount of respect and reverence for them, and for the fellow comics and improvisors that I share the stage with who also happen to be women. The struggle to do this work is far from over, as made clear by Christopher Hitchens' article in Vanity Fair.

In January 2007 the gauntlet was thrown.

Self-appointed spokesperson for the boys club, Christopher Hitchens of Vanity Fair, wrote the highly publicized article "Why Women Aren't Funny". The title was designed to catch the eye, make headlines and ruffle feathers. And it did just that, ultimately triggering Alessandra Stanley, spokesperson for the girls club, to respond to Hitchens in the April 2008 issue of Vanity Fair with the essay, "Who Says Women Aren't Funny?".

I'm neither the type of person to judge a book by its cover, nor am I the type to judge an article by its title. But Hitchens' title flicks the reader on her forehead, draws the line in the sand and dares her to cross it. Being the pacifist I am, at the time of the article's publication I chose not to read it. I chose not to retaliate, validate or comment on the article in anyway. I mean, who is Hitchens anyway? Some British-born academic/journalist/literary critic? Some alcoholic, polemicist who's known more for being a provocateur than saying anything revelatory?

I digress. Claws retracted.
(I guess I don't like being thumped betwixt me brows).

Well, recently curiosity got the best of me and despite my better judgment I read the article. I read knowing that the lens with which I would view this article would be inevitably skewed by my gender, race, vocation and experience. Despite these handicaps, I was determined to wade through the seemingly endless sea of his witless bravado, arrogance and condescension in search of floating logs of truth and insight. I did my best to read it with an open mind. I tried to hear Hitichens' arguments clearly, and digest them with as much objectivity as I could muster - all without throwing up in the back of my mouth.

And after reading the article I was left feeling as if I might have missed The Hills finale. So I checked, and I didn't. So reread the article again to insure that my preoccupation with the Audrina and Lauren fall-out hadn't caused me to miss something important.

I didn't.

While he had some valid points, he muddied them with such pretense and impudence, that it was hard to separate the wheat from the chaff. I actually happen to agree with several of Hitchens' assertions, one of which being that men have adopted humor as a technique with which to woo.

[Men need humor to attract women] ...Women have no corresponding need to appeal to men in this way.

I also agree with Hitchens that women are socially discouraged from being funny.

Precisely because humor is a sign of intelligence (and many women believe, or were taught by their mothers, that they become threatening to men if they appear too bright), it could be that in some way men do not want women to be funny.

Hitchens even makes several (seemingly calculated) remarks attacking the male intellect in a good natured attempt to win over those the title of his article may have offended.

Wit, after all, is the unfailing symptom of intelligence. Men will laugh at almost anything, often precisely because it is—or they are—extremely stupid.

Jokes about calamitous visits to the doctor or the shrink or the bathroom, or the venting of sexual frustration on furry domestic animals, are a male province.

But all of these comments served as amuse-bouche to manipulate the reader, and make the main course of asinine generalizations more palatable, enjoyable even.

In any case, my argument doesn't say that there are no decent women comedians. There are more terrible female comedians than there are terrible male comedians, but there are some impressive ladies out there. Most of them, though, when you come to review the situation, are hefty or dykey or Jewish, or some combo of the three.

He proceeds to list hefty, dykey, Jewish ladies to prove his point. All of which are in fact hefty, dykey, Jewish and unarguably funny. I don't take issue with his lists, but in that they're presented through such egregious aphorisms that are riddled with bigotry.

Slower to get it, more pleased when they do, and swift to locate the unfunny—for this we need the Stanford University School of Medicine? And remember, this is women when confronted with humor. Is it any wonder that they are backward in generating it?

We are all born into a losing struggle. Those who risk agony and death to bring children into this fiasco simply can't afford to be too frivolous.

I'm not arguing against the science of humor, or the inherent differences between men and women, and their respective senses of humor. I get it. (Go Cardinals!) I'm not even arguing the trend he's found in the kinds of women who are "allowed" to succeed in this field. I'm arguing against Hitchen's point that humor is a birthright reserved for men, usurped (and as a result sullied) by women.

It is clear from this article that the issue of gender and comedy is not dead, but alive and well and ever so relevant. In trying to understand my own struggle with this issue, I stumbled upon an amazing (albeit short lived) series on girls and comedy on the BBC called, Girls Who Do Comedy. It was refreshing, eye-opening and extraordinary to see such a phenomenal group of hilarious women come together and talk openly about their journey and struggle with the same issues.

Dawn French interviews: Morwenna Banks, Sandra Bernhardt, Jo Brand, Eleanor Bron, Kathy Burke, Margaret Cho, Denise Coffey, Phyllis Diller, Jenny Eclair, Mo Gaffney, Mel Giedroyc, Whoopi Goldberg, Sheila Hancock, Helen Lederer, Miriam Margolyes, Penny Marshall, Kathy Najimy, Sue Perkins, Miss Piggy, Joan Rivers, Rita Rudner, Jennifer Saunders, Sarah Silverman, Linda Smith, Laura Solon, Jessica Stevenson, Meera Syal, Wanda Sykes, Lisa Tarbuck, Catherine Tate, Tracey Ullman, Julie Walters, Ruby Wax, Victoria Wood and Gina Yashere.

I loved the questions Dawn French asked these women so much that I plan on following up this post with my own answers to these questions.

Stay tuned, the struggle continues....

Happy Holidays America!!

2008-12-25T07:45:00.001-08:00

Dear America,

Oh, how I miss you! How's the family? I just want you to know that I've been thinking about you a lot, especially this holiday season.

I want you to know that there's nothing quite like you in the world, and I think about you all the time. I'll be coming home in a few months and I can't wait to see you!

I hope this holiday brings you all the love and laughter you can stand!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Always,
Natasha

And just when you thought she couldn't get better....

2008-12-18T00:03:00.000-08:00

I started r aving about Adele nearly a year ago, and her album is still in heavy rotation on my ipod. I simply can't get enough and I'm not the only one who thinks so: four Grammy nods.

And just when I was starting to feel the pangs of longing for her sophomore effort, I discovered Adele 1988, a remix of the 19 album to the tune of 80's, 1988 to be exact.

It's so damn fly.

Mick Boogie, genius DJ and Kweli cohort, has put out a FREE remix of 9 tracks. All the songs are remixed to be throwbacks to the days of high top fades, gold chains, velour track suits and Adidas turtle-shell kicks.

The songs have breathed a new life into my love affair with Adele.
And if you weren't a fan before, you will be now.
Download, listen and get ready to wobble, wobble and drop it like it's hot.

NYC

2008-12-05T02:56:00.001-08:00

Make It Stop!

2008-12-03T05:58:00.001-08:00

I feel about work, the way this kid feels about puppets.

More Ida Maria

2008-11-29T05:18:00.000-08:00

Oh my God she's good. I have full album now, Fortress Around My Heart, and I can't get enough. The whole thing is fantastic and there truly isn't a cut that I don't like - totally rare.

This is, "Drive Away My Heart."
My favorite part is when she cuddles a life size version of her own heart.

In addition to awesome upbeat tracks like "I Like You So Much Better When You're Naked," there's also brilliant ballads like, "See Me Through." There isn't a video for it yet, but here are the lyrics to whet your appetite.

See Me Through
Ida Maria

Oh God, now when's the time for me?
Oh when will you see me through?
Oh God, my mind is eating my heart out.
Oh God, my heart is beating my mind out.

Oh...

Oh God, I can't believe in you, just because I'm afraid you're true.
Oh God, I can't believe in you, just because I'm afraid you're true.

Oh God, now when's the time for me?
Oh, when will you see me through?

Oh God, I can't believe in you just because I'm afraid you're true.
Oh God, I can't believe in you just because I'm afraid you're true.
Oh God, I can't believe in you just because I'm afraid you're true.
Oh God, I can't believe in you just because I'm afraid you're true.
Oh God, I can't believe in you just because I'm afraid you're true.
Oh God, I can't believe in you just because I'm afraid you're true.

Slow, simple and beautifully sung. There's just so much raw, gritty emotion in her voice (very Joplin). There are also pretty strings on the track and I love me some strings, especially pretty ones.

Finally, there's the track that I have had on repeat the last few days, "Queen of the World." It's genius, if for only the first line of the chorus: "I'm queen of the world. I bump into things."

Get it and go forth and rawk.

Gobble Throttle

2008-11-27T01:31:00.001-08:00

Tappy Hanksgiving!!!

2008-11-26T05:11:00.000-08:00

Meet Addictionary.

I can't tell you how many times I hear made up words, or how many times I've made up words. Here's a website dedicated to our verbal snuffoos. The definitions are particularly hilarious.

Enjoy!

An oldie but a goodie.

2008-11-24T22:42:00.001-08:00

Family Guy in Asian Town.

Viva La Giggle

2008-11-17T08:32:00.000-08:00

www.gigglethrottle.com is back in action.
Freed from the clutches of death, she has arisen like a phoenix from the ashes.
Long may she live.

Oh, Facebook.

2008-11-16T18:18:00.000-08:00

Drum Roll....

2008-11-13T01:13:00.000-08:00

Here are SNL's new female pics Michaela Watkins and Abby Elliott . What do you think?
You can read the full article here.

And at the risk of sounding like an arrogant, self-aggrandizing, deluded, stupid face:
I think ...maybe...I could...do this...too? Maybe? One day?

Here's hoping.

Abby Elliott

Michaela Watkins

Bloggu is Japanese for Blog

2008-11-11T02:37:00.000-08:00

After a year with the domain name of Gigglethrottle.com, I have to say goodbye. I failed to renew the address amidst the chaos of relocating 1/2 way around the world, and it was bought out from under me. Yay democracy!

BUT FEAR NOT!!!

While I try to get the new owner to return my precious gigglethrottle domain name back to me, you can still view my comedic musings at ye old faithful http://gigglethrottle.blogspot.com/.

The other good news is that Thoreauup.com is still alive and well. So feel free to check out my travel musings there if the spirit moves you.

Hair of the Dog

2008-11-09T01:40:00.000-08:00

I heard the expression, "Hair of the Dog" recently. I had no idea what it meant. I was told by the Canadian who introduced me to the phrase that as an American I should have known it, and its meeting: have another drink.

This is said to be the golden rule for those who find themselves hungover. Drink some more and it will make it all better.

I saw this picture in today's NYTimes and was reminded of the expression. After binge-drinking bottles Bush, Rove and Cheney, America has finally woken up and we've got some pretty gnarly hangover symptoms (courtesy of NPR):

Economic Crisis
Job Losses
Collapsing Industries
National Security
The War in Iraq
Energy Costs
Health Care
Global Warming
Executive Powers
Campaign Finance Reform
Equal Justice
Private Contracting
Immigration Rules
Telecommunications
Labor organizing
Education Reform

Just to name a few.

It is my most earnest and sincere prayer that America doesn't fall off the wagon again and have another drink.

A friend of mine here in Japan who is a recovering addict once told me that getting sober was the easy part, and that staying sober... that's the hard part. America's got to stay sober because it's only with the clarity that comes with sobriety that we can fully see these issues, the extent of the damage caused by them and address them the best way we know how - one day at a time. And we don't have a choice because if we have another drink the list gets longer, the damage deeper.

My friend also told me that when asked how long she's been clean that her only response is, "I woke up today at 9:30," implying that her fight is for today. It's not about yesterday, or tomorrow. It's about right now.

I voted.
I've said, "Yes we can."
But what am I going to do today?
What am I going to do today to make sure the changes I've been championing come to fruition? What can I do in my little corner of the universe to Ghandi-it up, and be the change I want to see in the world?

I don't know the answers to these questions, but damn it if I'm not going to try and figure them out, today.

44

2008-11-05T23:28:00.000-08:00

I woke up today late...really late. For two nights I've had election-related insomnia:

Night #1 was spent listening to and watching election news into the wee hours of the morning.
Night #2 was spent crying like a baby, and trying to wrap my brain around the bigness of what had happened.

The race was called while I was working at the conversation school near my house. I had just ran from a staff meeting into the office where I quickly begged for use of the computer, logged on and promptly burst into tears. I clicked from news site to news site trying desperately to disprove Obama's victory and couldn't.

I wanted to jump out of my skin.
I wanted to fly.
I wanted someone to punch me in the face.

None of that happened.

I immediately tried calling my family and after dropped connections and missed calls, I got a hold of my brother. We celebrated over the phone briefly, then I asked him to get my father to call me. Which he did. By the time my dad called I had collected myself...or so I thought. But upon hearing the utter joy in his voice, I began to cry all over again. This time harder and with snot.

Lots of snot.

I ran into the stairwell to curb the embarrassment. While sitting gracefully - legs akimbo, snotting and doing that stuttered-breath-inhale that little kids do when they try to get it together - my father desperately tried to get me to listen. When I came to, he told me that Obama was about to take the stage, then he put the phone up to the television so I could hear. There in a stairwell, half-way around the world, I listened to answered prayer. Stifling my sobs, as to hear more clearly, I listened intently and immediately felt drunk with a mix of joy, relief, and disbelief.

A cocktail that should not be imbibed at work.

After Obama finished, I briefly blubbered words (I'm not quite sure as to what they were) to my father, and probably thanked him for bringing our worlds closer.

After work, I stopped by the market on the way home to grab dinner. With cheeks stained with mascara and a silly grin I walked into my local grocery store. I had been to this store countless times, but it looked different. Everything looked different and I felt different. Then it hit me: I'm not ashamed to be from America anymore. I can hold my head up high and feel, for the first time since I've been here, unapologetic about where I'm from.

This was when the total-body euphoria set in.

I couldn't get out of the store fast enough for fear of grabbing a random Japanese person and kissing them squarely on the mouth, with tongue. Japan is a quiet place. You'll rarely see someone under the age of 18 express extreme emotion publicly. And if you do, it is usually accompanied by apology or glares from onlookers. So, I knew that I had to leave and leave quickly.

I hurried through the check out, hopped on my bike and sped home. I thought to myself, "If I could just make it home to scream in my pillow, I won't explode." No such luck. I was a block away from my house when, like a person with Tourette's syndrome, I yelled at the top of my lungs, "OBAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I then proceeded to laugh like a crazy person, peddling with Lance Armstrong speed home.

When got home, I sat glued to my computer watching America errupt the same way I had. Only this erruption was "acceptable" and in much bigger numbers. I had never missed being home so much. So I cried some more.

Today, after the aforementioned oversleeping, I arrived at the private school in the nick of time. During my break, I was greeted by the math teacher. We've spoken in the past: a delightful mix of broken Japanese and broken English. I wasn't sure what he was going to say, but braced myself. And in perfect English he said to me with a smile, "Yes we can."

I said it back, smiled and excused myself. I cried in the bathroom.

This is big people, and I just feel so fortunate to be alive to witness and participate in it. There aren't words enough to describe how big, incredible, and life affirming this all is.

So I'll simply say: Yes. We. Can.

Ego is English in Japanese

2008-10-28T20:14:00.000-07:00

The Japanese are too polite.

If you are intent on making it as an artist you will have to endure thousands of auditions. Seeing as I'm intent, I've endured my fair share of auditions. Good, bad and ugly. Rejection is the name of the game, so I've developed a thick skin. You have to. I've come to realize that rejection isn't personal, and that more often than not it has to do with factors outside of my control, outside of the actual talent I possess, or my ability to perform a particular part.

Seeing that rejection is 9/10ths of the law of the audition, most theaters don't mince words when telling you no. There's no sugar coating, hand holding or niceties. It's straight forward and to the point. I kind of like it. I'm built for it.

I never thought I'd miss that.

I've auditioned for two things since being in Japan. A quasi-audition for The Tokyo Comedy Store, where I spoke to the director and was observed at a couple pay-to-play classes and I was in. That has worked out great and I've been performing with them for months now. And my second audition, which I just blogged about.

It had been about a week since I had auditioned for the children's show. I hadn't heard from the agent who "discovered" me at the comedy show and asked me to audition. So I just assumed that no news was the answer: I didn't get the part. Moving right a long. No hard feelings, just another audition.

Just when I had put the whole Sea, Sea, Sea audition behind me, I got an email that said:

I hate to tell you this but unfortunately they decided not to have you in
the cast this time.

They liked you but the reason why was that they think you would be too good
and you would be stand out more than the lead girl.

Now, that's sweet. But I don't for one second actually think that the reason I wasn't cast was that I was "too good." Call me cynical, but it's true. The agent for this audition was amazingly fantastic, kind and as made evident by her email, truly concerned with the feelings of her clients.

How completely unAmerican.

I have survived auditions in the states where an auditor ate a meatball sub while I was doing a dramatic peace, been interrupted while a director took a phone call, and been told "thanks," (the six letter mark of death for any audition) mid-monologue. Only for one of the biggest, most costly auditions of my life did I get an actual reason for not being cast (which is still rare). The reason? "You were great, but we didn't need you." Harsh, desho? Of course, but that is what I signed up for.

Niceties in the vein of this email in the States would cause a person to guffaw in the face of their auditors. Seeing as it was an email, I guffawed to myself.

My cynical side wants to believe that my inability to sing A Sailor Went to Sea, Sea, Sea and the subsequent train wreck of an audition were the real reasons for my not being cast. But seeing as I am in the land of the painfully polite, I am going to indulge in the idea that my talent is so amazing that to have it on stage with lesser beings would have ruined the production.

Who would have thought that auditioning could ever give me an ego boost?

A Sailor Went to Sea Sea Sea, and died.

2008-10-17T05:50:00.000-07:00

I went on an audition yesterday, kind of.

I was surprised a few days ago when I got a call from an casting agent in Tokyo. She had seen me perform improv downtown and thought of me when she was asked to cast show. Now if this in and of itself weren't enough, the show happens to pay 2K and performs for only one weekend in Osaka and Tokyo (all expenses paid). Needless to say, I was jazzed to get the call.

Later via email I learn that the show is in fact a kids' show. Not ideal, but for 2K and only 3 days of work I'd do a strip show (let's just be real). So, I agree to the money, er, um...I mean I agree to do the show. I then get notice that the producers want to meet with me. They have my headshot and resume, but they want to make sure that I have the goods. Now, I'm told that this meeting is just a formality and that they like what they've seen. No worries. Right?

Wrong.

I go to a small voice studio in the heart of Tokyo. Yes, this children's show is a musical. Am I worried? No. It's kids music and holiday themed. They didn't even want me to prep 16 bars, they wanted me to do a cold reading and sing from a CD they have. Easy.

I get to the studio, and I meet with the musical director for the show. It's all very odd. There are 8 women and only the agent and I speak English. I'm told they want me to sing "A Sailor Went to Sea Sea Sea." This confuses me slightly, but I oblige. 2K, 2K, 2K....right? Right.

The music director, on the grand piano, warms me up in front of the 8 women. She then stops and begins to tell me in MANY uncertain terms that I should lift my soft palate more to get a more open sound. This slightly confuses me, but I oblige. 2K, 2K, 2K....right? Right.

I follow the instructions and lift my soft thingy and she is pleased, however temporarily. She then wants me to sing the song. The producer puts in the CD and out comes the sound of a very calypso-Christmas version of A Sailor Went to Sea Sea Sea. It's cute, funny, and jazzy. Three things I happen to be good at. So when cued, I sing. And it's not that bad. It's A Sailor Went to Sea Sea Sea for crying out loud. It's not Andrew Lloyd Webber, right? Wrong. She stops me and tells me in even more uncertain terms that she wants me to sing it in an opera-style.

Yes. Opera-style. What she said was translated to me as, "opera-style."

I'm confused by this, so I turn to look at the agent/translator again and she confirms that I am to sing A Sailor Went to Sea Sea Sea in an opera-style, in a room full of Japanese women. I am to do this with a straight face. I oblige. 2K, 2K, 2K....right? Right.

I get through this version. What I didn't realize is that I would have to go through about 29 takes of the song. "Natasha, why did you use the word "take" to describe the number of times you sang the song? Isn't that used just for film?" Yes. But I was on film.

Oh, did I fail to mention that I was being recorded? Yeah, I was being recorded by a woman who sat on the floor under the piano (because, like I said there were 8 other women in the tiny studio).

I start to sing (opera-style) the 27th take of a Sailor Went to Sea Sea Sea, and I'm stopped again. By this time I've taken off my shoes, and scarf and rolled up my sleeves. My soft palate is having spasms and I'm parched. I'm then told that my phrasing isn't fluid, and that while my pitch and melody is on point they want it more connected....more opera-y.

At this point I want to say to them, "Listen ladies, that muthafuckin' sailor done seen all he gonna see see see, so let's turn this GD ship around before somebody gets hurt."

But I don't say that.

2K, 2K, 2K...right? right!?! Right.

I sing what I think is the last take, and it is. I have never been so happy in my life to leave an audition. During the walk from the studio to the train I succumbed to the full extent of the injuries suffered from the audition. The remedy was listening to my iPod and texting some fellow actor friends to reaffirm the goodness in life and in the art from I've dedicated my life to.

I find out Monday if I landed the gig.
We'll have to see see see what happens.

Improv Makes Me Happy

2008-07-19T19:28:00.000-07:00

For 4 years in DC, every Tuesday night was filled by improv rehearsal. After my last week of rehearsals in the States, my Tuesdays were never quite the same. It was like this weird hole in my week. What to do with that time? I was conditioned to rehearse.

Because I'm genetically predisposed to be one of those creative performing types, one of the first things I do is look for a fix. And luckily I found improv. I started attending a weekly play to play, and quickly got entangled with regular cast of improv performers here and they've asked me to take the stage with them. I'm the newest member of Spontaneous Confusion! Woot Woot!

I feel so blessed and happy I could puke. And when things couldn't have gotten any better, they did. The rehearsal day for SponCon is TUESDAYS!!! Said hole, filled.

My first show is next Friday at 9PM in Tokyo. Can I just tell you how amazing it feels to say that? Like most artist, I feel that one way to get better at your craft you have to DO it more. And one of my biggest fears coming all this way was that I wouldn't have a chance to DO it. But that just shows me yet again that there is something (someone) bigger than me who knows my heart and wants me to be happy.

On my way to rehearsal I snapped a few pictures. I wanted you to see the dichotomy of stepping off the street (filled with all things Japan), into an Ex-pat filled room of people doing a western art from.

Summer Sonic Here I Come!!!

2008-07-17T17:40:00.000-07:00

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaacccckkkk

2008-07-14T18:08:00.000-07:00

Performing in Tokyo

I am way pumped! After a few weeks in the pay-to-play improv rehearsals, I was asked to play with the main team here in Tokyo! I have only met a few of the players, and I’m excited to see what they’re all like and how they play together. The folks I’ve met so far seem hella cool. Like I said before, improv folks are good people.

Seeing a Show in Tokyo

I saw my first play in Tokyo last week. The production was written by and expat (British) and performed my expats in a small British Pub downtown. The show was about a writer who is suffering from writers block, and is confronted by all the characters he has created. The line is blurred between his reality and the worlds he’s created through his work. This ultimately causes him to murder someone who may or may not have been one of his characters.

While the writing was on the strong-ish side, the acting was very “community theater.” But the thing that amazed me more than anything about the show is that despite the flaws of the production, I liked it anyway. I was impressed with the ability for foreigners from around the world who have found themselves in Tokyo to come together and create theater. Knowing the resolve it takes to do theater in the States – where English is spoken, and there is an audience for Western theater – I was even more impressed with this barebones production. It simply had so much heart.

I hope to entangle myself with the tiny theater company and have one of my plays produced. It would be an honor to tell the truth.

Barefoot Priestess of Improv

2008-05-31T23:58:00.000-07:00

So I took an improv class.

I have been dying to find a creative outlet and I found The Tokyo Comedy Store. They hold weekly pay-to-play improv jams in the city. Last week I attended and I had an amazing time.

There's something about the Improv Community that speaks to me. The type of people it draws, the community it fosters, the laughter it generates - everything about it makes me feel at home. This is even true on the other side of the world.

I have to admit that I was scared. I didn't know a thing about TCS before going. I didn't know if I would show up and find that I had paid $20 bucks to play Arms Through Expert and be told that I had to be funny. Luckily that wasn't the case.

There were maybe 13 shoeless expats from all over the globe (Wales, England, Saudi Arabia and the US), packed in a small room standing in a circle at the top of class. This two hour weekly workshop started like most improv workshops I'd led: name games, icebreakers and warm-up exercises. It was really humbling for me to go from someone who had been used to leading such play-to-play workshops, to paying to being in one. But to be honest it felt really good. I haven't been a student in quite sometime, so I enjoyed turning off the part of my brain that assesses the work of others. It was nice to focus on myself and to be reminded of the tried and true basics of improv.

After the niceties, there were longer scenes (3 minutes long with 4-6 people) side coached by the teacher. This was a bit hard to do... and watch. Both for the sheer number of people on stage and for the varying levels of ability in the class. Clearly there were a few who knew what they were doing, a few who didn't, a few who didn't and thought they did. Going up in my group in front of the class was awesome. I thought at first I would hold back and not "show off," but it's hard for me to be on stage and not do what I know how to do. So I did what I do.

At the risk of sounding arrogant, the class seemed to dig what I brought and that felt good. I feel really blessed that there is something in this world that I do well and that I like to do, and that there are venues where I can do it.

There was a funny moment (not the ha ha kind) during class involving me and another student. A guy joined the class late (after the introductions, but during the warm-up exercise part of the class). He joined my group. It didn't take long for me to figure out who this guy was. He was THAT guy from improv class. The guy who thinks he knows everything, but don't know all that much. The guy who thinks being louder means you're right. The guy who finds it hard to acknowledge a improviser, who happens to be a chick, might just know what she's doing.

So, the group starting doing Line-at-a-Time Story, and he was sitting next to me.

Spanish Girl - Once upon a time, there was a little girl who dreamed of going to India.

Natasha - When was old enough, she bought a one way ticket to Bollywood.

Late Guy - Um....let's go back to when she was 13. When she was 13 she....

Late guy then proceeded to instruct the group that denying is bad and you should really try to stick with the story. His way of telling me that I messed up, and how to not do it in the future. At first I was pretty angry. Not at him, but not feeling supported. I hadn't felt that in years, and even in the simple Line-at-a-Time exercise it was amazing how hurt I could feel from not having my contribution count.

The story continued, and so did the subsequent exercises, with out my saying anything about it to him. I figure I just let my work speak for itself. By the time I took the stage for my group scenes, I think it started to dawn on Late Guy that he had sized me up all wrong. Following class I was approached by several classmates who commented on my performance, and who wanted to know my improv background. Late Guy hung back. Possibly embarrassed that he'd got it wrong with me? I don't know.

I'd be a liar if I said that I wouldn't take satisfaction in that. (I'm evil)

This week should be fun. I hope this group can help me find a place in the company where I can play in a more challenging environment. I'll keep you posted.

Seriously?

2008-05-31T18:50:00.000-07:00

I'm kinda embarrassed to be a Democrat right now.

After reading this article in the Times today, I'm befuddled. How could a party poised to take the White House in November, squander the opportunity with infighting? We're making no headway in making the Democratic platform known, because that's not news worthy. Is it accessible? Sure, anyone with a computer and Google can visit their Democratic candidate's website and get the skinny on what they stand for. But again, not news worthy.

Here I am, half a world away and the message being sent by the US media? "Come watch a black guy and a white chick fight today after school." McCain comes a cross as the distant principal, who knows what's better and in a Solomon-like way is letting the kids fight as to let them build character.

I for one, want this thing to be over. Not just because the US is embarrassing itself with this drawn out, albeit historic, cat fight. But because the Party needs to make up for lost time. McCain, the presumptive Republican Party nominee, has had all the time in the world to present his agenda with very little push back from either Hillary's or Obama's camp.

I believe there's still time for us. But not much. The aforementioned Times article said that Hillary supporters were chanting "Denver! Denver! Denver!" at the Democratic Party meeting concerning Michigan and Florida. Insinuating that they want to take this fight to the DNC. Another article I read said that a pocket of Florida voters argued that if their vote wasn't counted, they'd vote for McCain on principle. PRINCIPLE. The actual words of these voters.

We just need to get it together folks. Before it's too late and we're stuck with Principal Belding.

Baby Got Back

2008-05-23T03:45:00.000-07:00

I was standing on the train today.

Note: The seats on the train line the sides of the train, facing in. So if you're seated, no matter what, you're facing the other person across the aisle which runs the length of the train.

I choose to stand because my stop is coming up. I stand near the door. To my left, there is a man sitting reading Manga.

Note: Manga are comic books. They are bible-thick, heavily illustrated, and read from back to front. There's hero/villain children's themed Manga, and there's hero/villain politically themed Manga. Basically there's a Manga to scratch every itch.

To look at someone on the train - gawk, stare - is thought to be wholly disrespectful and to be avoided at all costs. Unless, of course, you happen to be a foreigner on the train. In which case you can be stared at, gawked at and even heckled. So I am careful not to look back at all of the people looking at me. While I'm standing there can't help but glance down, and I notice that the man sitting next to me is reading Porn Manga.

Note: The following is not made up.

I can't read the Kanji writing, but the picture speaks volumes. Depicted was a Japanese man, having the butt-sex with an African tribal-type woman. How do I know this? Big lips, big tits (down to her knees), big butt, big nose...oh, and the plate in her lower lip. The tufts of nappy hair also were a giveaway.

I don't know if I exhaled or inhaled sharply, but something caused the man (who hadn't noticed me before) to look up. He shuts his book, and at the same time he gasps so loud several people on the train look (breaking the aforementioned rule of NOT looking). I don't turn away, I look back at him with the, "I know what you did," face.

He blushed and became visibly flustered. And I ...started laugh. I couldn't help it. The moment was exquisite. I couldn't have asked for a better ride in to work.

Batman and Robin

2008-05-22T03:18:00.000-07:00

I was walking home last night with Keri. (Keri is half of the lovely couple "Keri and Mario," who teaches at M.I.L. with me). I'm walking home with her because this dynamic duo, who is leaving Japan in September, has bequeathed a TV, TV stand, and a couch to me. (Yeah, they rock).

So as we walk to her apartment to get the first installment, we past the neighborhood park. And there upon a giant cement mound-thingy, sits her husband taking photos of the full moon.

We stop to chit chat for a bit, and wait for him to finish. At one point I stop and look up at the moon. (For those that know me, know that this is something I can be caught doing most). The night could not have been more cool.

Then I saw a night bird.

I follow the night bird through the air where it catches the strong light of a street lamp.

Natasha: If I didn't know better, I'd say that's a bat.
Mario: They all are.

[I look up and see that there are actually 5 "night birds"]

Natasha: ...I just shat myself.

An Officer and a Shinshi

2008-05-17T23:59:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time, at Nichidimae Elementary School in Japan, there lived a guard.

This guard would stand post outside of the gate of the private school. Natasha-san would see him on Thursdays and Fridays when she left work. With every greeting, she realized that the guard's English was very good.

One day, as Natasha-san was leaving, as she did every week, but something happened.

"It's a beautiful day," said the guard. "Yes it is. And I'm glad it stopped raining, " Natasha-san said. "The day is beautiful. Beautiful like you," smiled the guard.

And they lived awkwardly-seeing-each-other-and-pretending-nothing-was-said ever after.

The End.

......

This compliment would have been adorable and awesome if I were attracted to the guy, but not so much. However, I was thrilled that the pick-up lines I'm getting are improving.

Pick Up-Lines While in Japan

1. Hello, American!? [insert lewd gesture here]
2. I like your noodles. [insert raised eyebrows and lip licking here]
3. [insert laughing] - this may not have been a come on, but I'm going to own it.

Oh Japan, you flirt you.

Improv Ninja

2008-05-14T07:49:00.000-07:00

Blessed art thou, Google, amongst all other things on the internet. For thou hast found me somewhere to doeth improv. And all God's people said, Amen.

Amen.

Meetup.com is about the most amazing thing ever. I found this site in the states surrounding the 2004 election. I didn't bother to actually go to any political round-tables, but I thought it made me cool to almost go every week.

I rediscovered this online miracle thanks to Google, and the key (I'll even go so far as to say, genius) word search: "Improv and Tokyo." That search brought me to, "The Tokyo Comedy Store Improv Workshop" meet-up group. TCS holds weekly, pay-to-play rehearsal jams, and next week I'm going to bring them some DC flavor.

I. Am. Stoked.

Granted, I've never paid $20 bucks to play a rousing game of "Arms Through Expert," but I'm desperate.... and, it just might be fun. And who knows, this may be some sort of vetting process to suss out new recruits for an elite task force of Improv Ninjas.

Free Falling

2008-05-12T08:22:00.000-07:00

I'm in desperate need for a creative outlet.

Working on my plays, and reading my artsy fartsy stuff is great. But I'm an addict and my drug of choice is performing. I'm on the hunt for a dealer. But until then, I'm going through withdrawal.

Forgive me if I sound like a tree-hugging, crystal-wearing hippie. But performing allows me to transcend. It is the little gift, God's given me to make the world a better place. Not performing, is like littering. And I'm no litter bug.

Soon. That's what I keep telling myself. In the meantime I'll continue to treat my classes like a show. Where I play a teacher in Japan. A teacher with some sort of malady...lupus. Yes, I'll play a teacher with lupus who moonlights as a ninja. Yes, a lupus ninja. A teaching lupus ninja.

Where's Waldo-San?

2008-05-11T00:34:00.000-07:00

In December, I received a forward email from one of my best friends.

This was that email:

Win 2 Airline Tickets WIN 2 AIRLINE TICKETS.
ALL EXPENSES PAID TO THE 2008 OLYMPIC GAMES IN PEKING, CHINA.

To participate is very easy. Just see the attached photo. Correctly answer the following questions and send your answers to the International Olympic Committee.

1. Which student seems to appear tired/sleepy?
2. Which ones are male twins?
3. Which ones are the female twins?
4. How many women are in the group?
5. Which one is the teacher?

Good Luck !!!

When I first saw this, I laughed. (Terrible, I know.) Especially because it's annoying when people say all black people look alike. And then I thought, when I get to Japan, I won't have this issue. It will be easier to see individuals as individuals, regardless of their appearance. My western gaze will be diversified. I will riiiiise above, and I will win the tickets to the Olympics of my heart.

Oh, how the high and mighty fall.

In addition to teaching English at the M.I.L (a language institute), I also teach at a Japanese private elementary school. I'm the only staff member at M.I.L. that teaches off site, in an actual classroom. I love this aspect of my job, because for two days of the week I am embedded in the culture in a way that I wouldn't have if I just taught at M.I.L. teaching sites - where students come to you, in groups of 3-5 to learn English.

At the private school, I teach Primary 1 to Primary 6. Equivalent to Kindergarten to 6th Grade. I teach groups of 45 students at a time, 6 times a day, for 2 days a week. The kids are amazing. They make no effort to disguise their fascination with my color, and my country of birth. This is refreshing and appreciated because the adults I teach try to act like they aren't affected by it. Which makes for stilted conversation, and "niceties," but I prefer the realness of the private school kids.

Like the little ones in the States, the younger kids at the private school have an early dismissal. So I leave the school the same time they do. At first this wasn't a problem. Groups of 10 would follow me to the train (they were catching the train too), and they would practice the day's English lesson with me.

It was great. Until I was attacked.

The little ones LOVE to play. And while they are creepily well-behaved in the classroom, on the train platform, they have NO self control, and NO respect for their foreign teacher.

One fateful day one of my precocious students got bored with the English chitter chatter, and tried to grab my ipod. I stopped him. Then he goes for my shoes. I stopped him. Then he hits me. He hits me a lot. He's laughing the whole time. Clearly he's having the time of his life. And I would have indulged his playful spirit if the circumstances were different. But here I am, the ONLY foreigner on the station platform. With about 10 kids. 10 of THEIR kids and one the kids is hitting me and causing a scene. So the whole station is looking at ME. I can't speak to them and explain who I am to these kids or speak to the kids in Japanese to tell them to calm down.

The next day, I tell Mrs. Kaneko, a teacher who speaks English at the school, about the incident. She explains to me that all the English teachers before me went through the same thing. (This was comforting). Then, she said something to me that sent a chill up my spine.

"Show me who he is, and I'll talk to his homeroom teacher."

"Show me who he is." !?!?!? I teach about 250 Japanese children in a day. Not only that, all the children are in UNIFORMS. He was small, so I knew he was either in Primary 1 or Primary 2 . This cut the police line-up down to about 80 students.

I started to sweat. I couldn't just say to Mrs. Kaneko, "Forget about it. Never mind." And I sure as hell couldn't say, "This is a needle-in-the-hay-stack situation lady." So I did the only thing my ego would let me do, I set out to I.D. the culprit.

I taught my first couple of classes and ruled out all but two of the students. "How did you do that?" Well, I gave everyone a high-five when they came in. I figured it would help to have each of the kids hit me, so I might recognize him that way.

So there I was with two kids. One of them hit me and tormented me on the train platform. One didn't. I did the only thing my conscience would let me do.

I turned them both in.

I know what you're thinking, "Natasha, you are evil. You are a terrible human being." To that I say, "I know." My only solace is that Mrs. Kaneko will investigate the matter with the kids and widdle the two, down to the one who did it.

I didn't get the gold medal in race relations. But I'll settle for a silver.

Don't Drink the Kool-Aid, But Try the Meatballs

2008-05-07T23:58:00.000-07:00

One of the first, non-Japanese places I ventured to in Japan was IKEA.

This trip was practical and medicinal. The thing about IKEA, is that they're all the same. I entered the...well let's just call it a compound, and I was met with sights, sounds and smells so familiar. It was like I was home.

I was on a mission: a table and two chairs.

You see the beauty of Japanese living is simplicity. No superfluous things to clutter up your living space. This means my "furnished apartment" lacked a few things, namely a table and chairs. But the thing about being apart of the IKEA cult, is that you enter the compound with a very clear idea about what you need, but then your vision gets cloudy. Because everything is just so pretty. So pretty, and cheap!

So the table and chairs, turned into a table, chairs, two end tables, a mirror, a clothes drying rack, two lamps, two floor mats, and some bath towels. Now this is fine. This is totally OK, if you drive. Because you can throw you booty into the car and head home. I had a commuter train. So that meant I had to ship my booty home.

I pulled out my pocket Japanese translator and approached a sales associate to help me figure out shipping. She patiently waited for me to butcher her language and responded in perfect English with "Aw, that's OK. I speak English. You can totally get everything shipped, I'll show you."

Just when I thought IKEA couldn't get any better, it did.

She's a Meat Eater

2008-05-05T23:53:00.000-07:00

I was a vegetarian (lacto-ovo pescatarian to be exact) for nearly 12 years. That has ended since my stay in Japan. And I'm so glad it did. I had the most amazing meal of my life at Kua 'Aina Burger. I ate a juicy all beef, bacon burger that brought me closer to God. I feel my abstaining for 12 years was so I could enjoy that burger and commune with Him.

You guys talk funny.

2008-05-03T23:45:00.000-07:00

I dared myself to go Japan and I won. Now the fun begins...

I've started teaching English at M.I.L., known to the locals at Margaretogauka - loosely translated to Margaret's Money Making Language Machine and Brothel.

For 23 hours a week, no more and no less, I teach English. All ages, shapes and sizes. I have Tuesdays and Sundays off, and most of my days start between 12PM and 3PM. Not bad. The teaching has been a lot fun. Hard work, but a lot of fun.

The curriculum is set, so it's hard to mess up. There's plenty of flexibility on how you cover the material, so long as the material is covered. And the students are awesome. Many were shocked to meet me on the first day of classes. But after the initial shyness wore off, my students were itchin' to practice their English on me.

When I'm not teaching, I try to go into Tokyo as much as possible. And if I don't make it there, I've been trying to visit of the stops on my subway line to check out my new city.

I'm half way through Golden Week - week long national holiday celebrating Boys Day, Children's day and some other awesome stuff. As a result, I've had a whole week off to explore and adjust. My fellow teachers are very cool, and I've gone to some cool spots with them (my entry on going to the Ramaen Museum is forthcoming).

All and all, my first month here has been good. I'll give it a solid B.

Finally having the internet has taken the edge off my culture shock, and makes all I'm going through worthwhile because I have you to share it with.

Stay tuned for entries on my 1st burger in 12 years, discovering Ikea, and Fumiyo.

Watch Out for the Quiet Ones

2008-04-20T06:05:00.001-07:00

I'm in Japan people!
I can't believe it.
But it's true.

Just a quick note to let you know that I'll be updating both Gigglethrottle.com and Thoreauup.com regularly about my adventures (as soon as my internet is up). So keep your eyes peeled.

I look forward to regaling you with with tales of my search for a creative outlet here. Will I take a class at Comedy Sportz Tokyo? Will I take up fan dancing? Or spend my nights singing Karaoke? Who knows!

Stay tuned to find out.

Brilliant.

2008-04-01T20:29:00.001-07:00

#1 Vacation Destination

2008-04-01T19:15:00.001-07:00

Sicklerville, NJ!!!

That's right. There's nothing that screams "getaway" like South Jersey's hot spot of Sicklerville. I've been chillaxing at my parents palatial estate for the last week and a half. And I feel that it is only right that I share with my loyal readers the diamond in the rough that is Sicklerville.

Here are the top 3 spots to visit while you're vacationing in Sicklerville:

#1 - Dunkin Donuts (on Rt. 42)
Don't miss the delicious tater tots - only $.99 with the purchase of a meal. I suggest the bagel breakfast sandwich. It's delicious!

#2 - Walgreen's (on Rt. 42)
This East Coast treasure is filled to the brim with specials that would make any shopper stop and ask, "THIS is too good to be true!". Well it is that good, and it is true. Try the 1Hr photo. Not only are they punctual, but the trainees will apologize profusely if (when) that screw up your pictures.

#3 - Target (on Blackhorse Pike, Rt. 42 and Rt. 42)
When you get to Sicklerville you'll be asking yourself "Which Target?!" There are 2 Targets in Sicklerville. And if your feeling fancy there's a Greatlands Target right one township over. These florecent-lit wonders will fill your days and nights with endless aisles of moderately priced joy.

....

In truth, Sicklerville ain't bad at all. It's home. My parent's rock, and I've been living like a princess since I've been back. I'll miss home a great deal when I go, so I'm going to make the most of it while I'm here.

Tonight I'm going to watch the 11pm NBC10 News. Tonight's leading story, "Cat Serial Killer on the Loose." This is the life.

Exit

2008-04-01T11:27:00.001-07:00

This is a sad day for me. This is the last Maria Bamford show. Take heart fellow comediennes, all episodes are available at SuperDeluxe.com.

New Bamford!!!

2008-03-19T09:00:00.000-07:00

I love this chick. I love her more and more each day.

WIT Classes - REGISTER NOW!!!

2008-03-17T11:43:00.000-07:00

I can't tell you how much I'll miss teaching in WIT's training program. Definitely one of the highlights of my time in the District. Do yourself a solid, and check out the WIT classes program. Rock your world. I dare you.

Spring session starts March 24th!

The reviews are in and the word is out: WIT is the area's premier improv troupe. But WIT players do more than perform improv with great expertise; our players bring the same passion and strengths to teaching improv.

Discover a new sense of freedom and play. Meet other fun and interesting people. Get away from the grind of the scripted city. Our comprehensive curriculum brings a wealth of skills and experience to everyone.

People from all fields take our classes to gain experience thinking on their feet and to unleash their own creativity.

Register now! Find out what one of WIT's improv classes can do for you by clicking on a listing above for more information or checking out our frequently asked questions page.

To be notified when the next round of registrations starts, email topher@washingtonimprovtheater.com

Behind Door #1...

2008-03-13T17:57:00.000-07:00

Today I've been opening my door to strangers, thanks to Craigslist. I've completed one sale, and I stand to sell everything else before I move. (Knock on wood).

The awesome thing about Craigslist Sales is the "reveal." When folks come to check out an item, they see the seller and the item for the first time. In an ideal situation, both the seller and the item meet your expectations.

There are few things that I get more joy from than watching someones face as they realize that the person that they've been talking to/emailing is actually black. Twice today, the men that came by to check out my goods, looked at me when I opened the door and tilted their head to the side and slightly smiled as if to congratulate me on successfully tricking them.

"Hi, I'm Jon."
Subtext: Well played.

"Hi, I'm Natasha."
Subtext: Believe it.

I can't WAIT to get to Japan.

"Hi, I'm Miki."
Subtext: Holy mother go God.

"Hi, I'm Natasha."
Subtext: Damn, I should have said Oprah.

Ear Candy

2008-03-12T18:29:00.000-07:00

I can't get enough of Santogold.

Unusual factoid #3902: She and I have a shared history of being the only black kid in our classes growing up. That's one hard earned girl scout badge.

Saved by the Bell

2008-03-06T16:40:00.000-08:00

Today was my last day teaching my DC kiddies.

After watching these clips, you'll understand why teachers should get paid more than basketball players. Sure, I was teaching Pre-K through 6th drama, but I still dealt with various levels of disrespect. Regardless of the students age, every teacher faces classroom shenanigans that only vary in severity and frequency.

Not all my days were tough, and not every kid was bad. But I'm not going to lie, I've felt like this dude before. And only God kept me from exploding.

I'm going to miss you DCPS.

Fey-ate

2008-03-05T14:16:00.001-08:00

A dear friend of mine recommended I watch 30 Rock.

I decided that I would test my this friend and bought all of season one, sight unseen. I have you know, I can now say that I would trust this friend to perform open heart surgery on me. He did not steer me wrong, he steered me home.

The biggest thing to love about 30 Rock (and there's a lot to love) is Tina Fey.

Vanity Fair recently put out their "Who Says Women Aren't Funny," issue - a quasi response to the infamous article by Chris Hitchen, entitled "Why Women Aren't Funny." As a woman in comedy (for nearly 10 years now) it goes with out saying that I take issue with the Hitchens' article, so I will spare you my rebuttal...for now. However, I will say that 30 Rock is proof positive that women are not only funny, but they are capable of the kind of work that, regardless of gender, demands respect.

I recently had a conversation with my BFF about role models - those people who have done what we aim to do, who can inspire us and maybe even give our quest some motivation, shape and context. Not everyone has one, nor do I think everyone needs one. And to be honest, I'm kinda weary of the title "role model." But I like the idea of having a person (or five) who I can admire, and whose journeys inspire me to go after what I want.

For me, Tina Fey's journey is worth looking at....looking at ruuuhll good.

Here's a chick who has accomplished so much - in front of and behind the camera. She seems to have navigated the choppy (and mostly male) waters of the Sea of Comedy and has landed safely on the shores of NBC, where she has kicked major ass.

In short, Fey's a broad with balls and that's the kind of chick I look up to.

I'm not the only one moving.

2008-02-28T17:19:00.000-08:00

BAMFORD IS BACK!!!

Getting Dirty

2008-02-24T17:51:00.000-08:00

This weekend was spent at the Dirty South Improv Festival.

In the words of Rayanne Graff, "I had a time." It was a hard decision to attend this festival, as I would be missing two of Caveat's performances. But, in then end I knew I would have to go down to the Dirty and represent. This would be my last festival for while.

There's nothing quite like the community and energy of improv festivals. At DSIF I found myself in the company some of the smartest and most talented people I've ever met. This resulted in some of the best entertainment of the festival happening offstage - in bars, cars, after parties, hotel rooms, restaurants, and parking lots. I laughed hard and often.

I have to admit there was a cloud over the festival for me. With every laugh, every meaningful conversation, every hello and every good-bye, I became overtly aware of the fact that it would be a while before I would experience something like that again. This forced me to be present, really present and experience the festival as a participant and not a spectator. It forced me to listen and take everything and everyone in, and to let loose.

I left with amazing memories. Memories that I'll need to sustain me abroad. Thank you DSIF.

2008-02-20T21:28:00.000-08:00

It's better than I thought.

Adele's new album, 19 is probably one of the best albums I've heard this year...and last year for that matter. I just got the new CD and I was delighted to find there wasn't a dud on the album - just one glorious jam after another.

I'm a lyrics girl. I mean, I love music for it's sound, that's a given. But what takes music to a whole new level for me are lyrics. Adele wrote 11 of the 12 tracks (borrowing one from Bob Dylan). Her lyrics are honest, raw and soulful. A triple threat in my book.

Her album isn't available in the states just yet, but I suggest that you head to Amazon.com and binge on some of the most delicious ear candy the UK has to offer.

Special Discount for Giggle Readers!

2008-02-18T15:42:00.000-08:00

Caveat's signature style takes an audience suggestion and explodes it into this world of possibility. With the fuel in the tank, snacks in the back and directions in hand, the players of Caveat set off on a veritable roadtrip of scenes that take you to a new, uproarious destination every single time.

We don't need an amplifier to blow your mind. Using improvised songs and scenes, Caveat Unplugged will lead you in and out of worlds created on the spot, just for you. Using just a guitar, played by the devilishly handsome James Williams, Caveat takes its trademark storytelling and comedic improvisation to a whole new decibel level. Rocking out is never easy, but somebody's got to do it!

THU Feb 21 l 8:00pm l $10 FRI Feb 22 l 8:00pm l $15 SAT Feb 23 l 7:30pm l $15 on the Comedy Spot's 2nd Stage (RATED PG-13) Buy Tickets GIGGLE DISCOUNT: ENTER "Toronto" to receive a 2 for 1 tickets!!!

Oh. My. Gawd.

2008-02-15T19:29:00.000-08:00

Narashino City

2008-02-14T07:12:00.000-08:00

I'm even CLOSER to Tokyo than I thought. My apartment will be in Narashino City (the little yellow star). I thought I was going to be in Chiba, but I'm further north.

And don't forget to check out my travel musings at Thoreau Up.

There's a thin line between want and need.

2008-02-11T13:10:00.000-08:00

On the metro the other night, I witnessed the most unsettling series of events.

I find myself drawn to a couple sitting on the train. The man has his arm around his girlfriend who looks as if she wants to crawl out of her skin because she can't stand him. Her head is leaning helplessly on the window next to her as the man she's with leans in closer and closer. Her body language and facial expression read, "leave me alone," but with every grimace he leans closer and closer.

I start to worry that his affection was leaning towards aggression, so I then begin to stare unapologetically to make sure she was OK. She glances at me and I see that there was no aggression, just ridiculous unwanted PDA.

The train comes to my stop and to my surprise and delight the couple stands to get off.

(This is the part that breaks my heart).

The couple gets off the train in front of me and I watch them leave. It's only as they walk ahead of me that I realize that the woman had a severe disability and could barely walk without his support.

I was wrecked when I saw this. I hurt for her, not because she was differently abled, but because she was stuck. The pain on her face on the train was so real and I when I saw her walk away I understood why.

Happy Monday!

2008-02-11T10:20:00.000-08:00

These two clips have made me very happy. Enjoy!

Domo Arigatō Mr. Roboto

2008-02-08T21:00:00.000-08:00

I'm moving.

Seriously.

Beginning in April I will be the newest resident of Chiba City, Japan. I will be working for a conversation school teaching private English classes to all age groups. All told, I will be in Japan for a year teaching, learning and growing.

About a year ago I set to work to get certified in TEFL (Teaching English as a Foreign Language). It started out as a means to diversify my employment search, as I was looking for ways to make my way out of DC. Then, after I completed the 6-month certification, I enlisted the services of a TEFL job placement service that then quickly put my newly ascertained certification to work. And work it did.

I know what you’re thinking, “Natasha, what about performing? You’re not giving that up are you?” Of course not. (And if you really know me you wouldn’t have to ask that). While performing, writing, directing and teaching are my life's passions - travel is in my blood. To deny my wanderlust would be disservice to it all the gifts God has given me. Because I feel certain that this journey will not only make me a better performer, writer, director and teacher; but it stands to make me a better person.

I’m equal parts “thrilled beyond belief” and “scared shitless.” I plan on documenting the ebb and flow of these emotions for you on Giggle Throttle and Thoreau Up, my new travel blog.

Stay tuned, the adventure begins now.

Si, se puede.

2008-02-04T04:33:00.001-08:00

Ripe for Parody.

2008-02-03T20:16:00.001-08:00

Now, that's funny.

2008-01-31T15:12:00.001-08:00

Courtesy of Mr. Ramsey.

It's True.

2008-01-30T14:38:00.000-08:00

This afternoon I was walking from Ben's Chili Bowl (with what will turn out to be a disappointing veggie burger and stellar fries).

I get halfway to the school and my bag of previously purchased beverages bursts open. I see and retrieve my Diet Dr. Pepper that hit the ground. I also had a Red Bull in the bag, so I look around for it, but the Red Bull was nowhere to be found.

Ladies and gentleman, my Red Bull sprouted wings and burst out of my bag. Lesson learned: Don't ever sleep on Red Bull.

Foreshadowing...

2008-01-29T20:36:00.000-08:00

2008-01-29T13:59:00.000-08:00

I've talked before about how I was stoopid excited that Robyn was back with a new album. She's now done a mix of Snoop Dog's Sexual Eruption. It's dope.

Check it out and get your freak on.

2008-01-26T16:40:00.001-08:00

Yet another reason why I love A Softer World.

I love all things Texican.

2008-01-26T12:42:00.000-08:00

Last night (despite being sicker than a dog) I hung out with one of my best girlfriends to dish about life, work, and men. As a single gal in the city, it's important to have those kinds ladies in your life. The kind that listen, support, and understand you. And the really good ones can make you laugh, even if you have a fever and can't taste your food.

Over what appeared to be shrimp fajitas, I caught up with Kathryn and dished about the aforementioned life, work and men. I talked about how, now that my show has closed, all those things in my life that I didn't have time to worry about are now taking center stage. How, instead of starring in a production about girl gangs in the Bronx, I'm back to starring in my life - a seemingly less complicated dramatic/comedy with fewer plot twists and higher stakes.

It's my hope that life, after teen pregnancy, razor blade fights and drive-bys, will begin to resemble something normal but still retain the excitement and leave me more satisfied.

2008-01-21T15:52:00.000-08:00

I heard these guys first on NPR's All Songs Considered. And now La Blogotheque (my new favorite music website) have featured Vampire Weekend. These Columbia grads are just too talented for their own good.

#80.2 - VAMPIRE WEEKEND - The Kids don't stand a chance
Uploaded by lablogotheque

C'est un pipe.

2008-01-20T19:58:00.000-08:00

One of my all time favorite artist, Kara Walker, was just mentioned in one of my all time favorite zine-blogs, Bust Magazine.

She's closing an exhibit at the Whitney on February 3rd. If you've never had the chance to see her work in person, do yourself a favor and go...now.

Her main medium is black silhouette. The detail and storytelling she does is extraordinary. Hands down, Kara Walker is one of the most prolific artists of our time.

Just. Plain. Badass.

Fin.

2008-01-20T11:01:00.001-08:00

Breath, Boom!
(a Haiku)

Tonight, it's over.
My life is restored again.
Ghetto-girl is dead.

Wow.

2008-01-17T21:08:00.001-08:00

Whoever mashed up the original Tommy Boy clip and the Will Smith interview is genius.

Click, Click.

2008-01-12T10:20:00.000-08:00

I've taken to photography like Amy Winehouse to blow. I'm loving it people. Here are some of my maiden shots with my new best friend. Enjoy.

(L-R: St. Augustine Church, V.W. Stage Manager for Breath Boom, Library of Congress, Capitol South Metro Station, my brother David, flowers I got from dad for my show)

Oatmeal in a Frying Pan

2008-01-11T20:59:00.000-08:00

This has been a rough week.

School is back in session after a two week hiatus. Now I'm back to waking up at 6:30AM and teaching the future of America drama. What makes this all uniquely tough is that I'm performing six nights a week at Studio Theater. My show was scheduled to close before school started. But because I'm so freakishly, amazingly talented and an awesome miracle/sight-to-behold on stage, the show was extended for not one, but TWO (count 'em) TWO weeks. This means I wake up at 6:30AM, leave my apartment and do not return until midnight. It's safe to say that this schedule has taken a toll on me.

Case in point:

The other night, I get home late and I'm starving. I had not eaten dinner because I chose to nap in lieu of food (goes to show you just how tired I've been). When I get home I'm faced with nil in the kitchen to satisfy me - I ain't have jack. You see my kitchen, while clean, is very bachelor-like. I'm talking month-old takeout containers in the fridge and little else in the cabinets.

But, as luck would have it, I spot oatmeal. I think, "Yes! I will make oatmeal. I will eat it and be satisfied." The voice of the Lord spoke to me and said, "Check to see if the oatmeal has expired." I look and see, "Best used by 11 APR 06." Yep, I had that same canister of oatmeal since I was 25 years old.

I took that warning as a suggestion, and I went ahead and made some.

In true bachelor form, I don't have a pot to cook the oatmeal. But, I do have a frying pan. Could I have microwaved it? Yes. Did I? No. I'd made up my mind, and I was going to fry up some oatmeal, damn it. Well, I followed the directions, said a prayer and hoped to God I survive.

I survived. And I sat happily in my arm chair, eating my fried oatmeal out of a mixing bowl with a plastic fork.

Only God knows why I'm still single.

Is it Christmas again?

2008-01-10T21:30:00.001-08:00

Another NEW Bamford!